asian invasion

When I was born my forehead was half my face.
They say that means good fortune.
When I smile my eyes become half moon shapes.
They make me seem kind.
Dad says I am the con of all cons.
That I am neither kind nor do I bring good fortune.

that's my amy tan version identity poem

topic: What makes you feel nervous? Why?

kid's response: My dad feel nervous when he don't listen to what my mom says.

me: okay, how many times does 2 go into 6?

same kid: (after a long hesitation): thuhrrrrrrreeeee.

me: don't speak like that. speak like a normal 3rd grader.

same kid: sorray. i's born in french! (grins)

....


caught same student picking her nose during class
me: s, go to the restroom and wash your hands please...
same kid: ooooook. (comes running back in less than a minute)
me: let me see your hands. (dry) did you really wash them?
same kid: (wiggles fingers) yes, just the tips!

this post is so soccer mom-ish

- yesterday was mother's day

4th time this year.

i'm SICK... again.
i used to never get sick.
now i get sick all the time--- and it lasts forever

after teaching choir, my throat was hurting and i was thinking to myself
'did i yell at the kids more than usual?'
then at night, it hit me like a storm
i started shaking like i had rabies
my legs. arms. head. everything hurt.
i tried to ride it out for a couple of hours until i couldn't handle it anymore
then i ran to frank and jony's room.

i know what you must be thinking.
c'mon 22 year old. don't you think you're a little too big to go running into your parents room in the middle of the night?
but i didn't know what else to do.


it wasn't even going to make my sickness go away;

still, it's better than nothing.

me being uncomfortable made two more people uncomfortable
oh well
they kinda just let me put my feet on their legs cuz mine were cold
thats what parents are for, i guess
they thaw out frozen feet (?)

after that i don't remember much else except waking up in the early morning and leaving them cuz it was too hot. they lost their appeal.

my dad told me that at one point, he put his hand on my neck to see if i was still hot
and i asked in a timid voice "who is this?"

noo goo sae yo ??

as if it was God, coming to take me away.

as if...

i'm taking this multicultural lit class. i love lit; can't help it.
well there was a paper and presentation due today;;; but i'm lazy

I'm not a full-time student. i didn't buy the book, OKAY???

i was considering going to the magnificent millenium million dollar library last night to borrow it, but i decided that spending hours upon hours with hayoungi outweighed a paper. (justification)
so i got up today at 7:40 and went to the c.c.library, borrowed the book, read it, and wrote a 5 page paper and set up my presentation by 9:30am. it was pretty fabulous and i kind of rocked it, too.
so i was sitting in class and i can't believe i had to go through an hour and half of people pronouncing meadow mee-doe (미도우).. and singing sing ging geu (싱깅그). meadow was a scoring high test vocabulary word for my frickin 3rd graders! this girl! she had the nerve to actually define that word as if she had had some kind of enlightenment. they really don't deserve that library.
(sigh)
well when i got out of class, i had 5 missed calls and a voicemail. FIVE MISSED CALLS!

frank

frank

frank

restricted number

frank

called up my buddy frank, all i hear is yelling.

WHERE ARE YOU?!

WHAT HAPPENED?

ee nom eh gee jee beh!
(sigh)

frank and jony. (sigh) i was so annoyed at the fact that i was leaving the house and they were still ZZzzz;; i even made a ruckus and left the milk out so they'd know i left the house early. (and to spite them and make them clean up my mess) 흔적 (HINTS), you know?
jony said they woke up at 8am and were talking for a bit when frank says at about 8:15, "wake up the beast. she has to go to school." she walked in to wake me up (aka yell at me), and i was gone.
they flipped out. they thought i went missing. they called ollie but a hannah picked up. they yelled at me. basically, i got in trouble.

(SIGH)

thought i should mention that the laptop has revived.


i don't know if it's official or not
but it's definitely summer.
kids come running into my class 10 shades darker.
jony got heatstroke on the golf course.



it's a tuesday, and i'm usually sad as hell on tuesdays
but this tuesday, i can feel summer fast approaching
vacations, relaxation, bikinis OH NO
but i aint grumpy; quite happy.



i'm glad to meet the rest of my life.

today is a good good day

i live simply right now.
all my life i've been striving to live in a way that is anything but simple.
simple is so ordinary and i hate ordinary.
i live simply right now.
i take classes i enjoy.
i go to work for a couple of hours.
i come home and eat.
i go out for a drink. (maybe more than one)
or i just sit at home and paint pictures.
it's so comfortable; i wonder if simple is for me.
i wonder.
when i see hayoungi smile, i want to drop everything and have a baby. (maybe ten)
the family. the man. the kids. is that all for me?
for now the answer is--- no.
but ask me in a couple of years.
things might be different then.

shinjirarenai

fyi i think it is quite alright to not have a single clue
it's okay to jump into things without knowing what the outcome will be
the outcome most likely will not turn out the way you think anyway
like for example
i went to art school without knowing if that was really what i wanted
yea i hated it but i came out with a better understanding of myself
and still i'd like to go to grad school
maybe cuz i'm masochistic
but that's just how i am.

potential is good.
being fat is good because it gives you potential to be skinny.
and when you turn skinny, all the props go to you because you accomplished it.
having zits that make you feel ugly is good, too.
because when you clear up and have good skin, you will feel good again.

i am a sad pimply fat ass right now but thats okay because i will be happy again.

<-- pimple mask

dying

my computer is dying.

the battery won't charge and it's telling me i have 24 minutes remaining.

i'm racking my brain trying to remember the first priority websites i must visit before it totally shuts off on me.

makes me wonder, what if life was like that?

what if i was told i have 24 minutes remaining in life?????
what would i do then?
can't even begin to imagine.

today my mind is in a whirl.

i'd love to explain, but i can't.

cuz then i'd be wasting the 9% of life i have left.